5 years ago today my life did a complete 360 degree when i found out i was HIV positive. That was a very hard day. After the tears and sayin why. I had t quickly get myself together because at the time i was in a long term relationship and i had to inform my then boyfriend of my now changed status. At the time of me finding out my status My best friend was there and did a good job comforting me as a good best friend is suppose to do i dont know what i would have done if i was all alone. My then boyfriend at the time took it hard and even though i cheated on him, it was hard those 2 weeks after i found out my status as we waited for his results to come back which were negative we concluded that prior to us starting a relationship in February of 2003 i was infected. I later put the puzzle together on to who it was that indeed infect me and even though he lied and said it wasnt him i knew it was.
I also had been working as an HIV/AIDS outreach worker which i started back in May 2003 so i knew my life wasnt over but still it was an hurtful feeling to know that i had a life threating illness that no medicine or nothin could cure. These last 5 years have been good for the most part health wise. I havent had any sickness except for a common cold and have been living a normal life. I have my good days and bad days, some days i am full of energy and other days it takes alot for me to muster up energy, but i get thru the day because i am a survivor. I have seen death knock at the door for so many former clients of mine and its sad that had to die at such a young age simply because they stop fighting the good fight for life. I cant even count how many personal close friends have become infected in the last 3 years. I get sad every time i get that phone call but i am glad that they know they can call me for counseling and know i will be there to fight the fight. Since moving here to DC from Florida i kinda of miss being actively apart in the community on a daily basis, but their our days i am happy. It is a very depressing job sometimes to have to tell someone after testing them that they are positive when they come back for their results, or helping a family in need to pay their rent when they been evicted. But my best time of workin in the field was the holidays when i saw the smiling faces of kids when we delivered gifts to their homes at christmas or a turkey with all the goodies at Thanksgiving. So in closing i am grateful to be alive and healthy and living each day to the fullest.