So here your official 2011 guide to relationships: "A Quick "HOW TO" Guide To Relationships"
1. Date: dating is healthy, go ahead and shop around.
2. Choose: After browsing around, if you've found a decent fit. slowly merge away from other prospects and put your main focus on that particular individual that catches your eye.
3. Be Real: you've decided to give this person a large portion of your time and attention. Don't waste time trying to give off an image that isn't who you really are.
4. Integrate: Now that you've kept it real. it's time to merge your social lives. Begin having dinner with each other's friends/family, maybe even co-workers. Know what you're really getting into before you start to claim this person. Because when you're in a relationship with ANYBODY. You're in it with them, their family, close friends, coworkers, even enemies and past lovers. It takes more then just the 2 of you to make it work. A great support system creates a sturdy foundation.
5. Make it official: you've been "talking" to this person for sometime now. they've been introduced to your closest friends and family. You've been introduced to theirs, and it's obvious that the two of you have positive intentions in mind. So why not put a title on your "situation"
6. Nesting: It's time to move in a new place together!! You've been attached at the hip for a minimum of 1 year, maximum of 2. experiencing each other in each month and season. you've spent the night over each other's apartments regularly. You know each other's spending habits, and some of each others quarks. You both realize that the two of you live at BOTH places. Tonight it's your place. 2morrow night it's theirs. Now i mentioned earlier a MAX of 2 years. I say this because you dont want to wait too long before moving in together. This is TRULY the only way you REALLY REALLY REALLY get to know a person. you don't want to spend 5+ years thinking you know someone to move in and realize you never knew them.
7. True commitment: now i'm not going to tell you when to get married. i think after living with someone for sometime. experiencing life fully merged. it'll just happen naturally.
(some people may disagree with me on some of this. but i just want to say that i dont understand how people get married who have never lived with each other for a period of time FIRST! to me that's crazy because you really never KNOW a person until you live with them)
As for the road bumps along the way...TALK! don't disguise problems. It's unhealthy NOT to argue, because problems are secretly tucked away, and simply grow larger. It's also not healthy to argue ALL THE DAMN TIME! because that means your asses aren't solving your problems! The key is to "fight fair" when arguing. Find a solution to your problems....compromise!!!!!!
