Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Dwight Allen Oneal Responses 2 being Gay Bashed

So for the past few days I have urged myself not to get angry and to practice forgiveness. In life we many times experience things and we often don’t understand why, I am true testimony that things just seem to happen and there is always a reason. Many of my friends and loved ones have already heard the horrible news about my minor attack on last Wednesday and no one knows of the details; well the time you have been waiting for has finally revealed itself.

So on last Wednesday at around 5:57PM I was heading downtown on the 3 train, when I got on the last car there were about five teenage boys on the train being loud and obnoxious. Living in New York City you become immune to the way that young people act and the way that they carry on, I have seen youth curse at each other, other passengers, fight, wrestle, and everything else when riding the train or walking down the street. When I did get on the train I decided that I would sit on the opposite end of the train and read my book “The Other Side of Paradise” by Stacyann Chin, while reading my book minding my own business and not even looking in the direction of the young boys, I heard them curse at each other, laugh, talk, and wild out in New York City youth’s normal behavior. In this entire process I did not feel concerned, threatened, or frightened at all; when the train entered the 96th street station I noticed the boys were walking in my direction and the first one had a plastic poster covering (lighter than glass, but harder than regular plastic) in his hand rolled up and the next thing I knew was I was being struck by it, immediately following the first blow another individual punched me in my face, I was down instantly. When I came too the doors had closed on the train and a young passenger on the train ran to my aide.

As the young men did run off the train I did hear homophobic remarks and thought back to my recent trip to Miami when a very masculine friend of mine was ashamed to be seen with me in public due to the fashionable garments that I choose to style myself in, mind you I don’t wear women clothing; however I am a fan of v-neck shirts, skinny jeans, and accessories. Him being deep from the south he is not accustomed to men dressing fashionable and defiantly not someone as comfortable with their sexuality as I am.

Honestly I have never been very masculine and New York has just assisted in me learning to accept myself not liberate myself. I remember a conversation where my friend said that Miami is very homophobic and not like New York and I argued back that New York, London, Little Rock, Miami, LA all have people who are just ignorant, homophobia is everywhere. If you cannot deal with my clothes and they alarm you, or my effeminate personality, then you cannot deal with me, because THAT’S WHO I AM AND I AM NOT SORRY THAT I AM NOT SOME BUTCH MASCULINE ACTING MALE! Gone are the days that I will pretend to be someone I am not to satisfy others, that is not loving ME and I love ME to damn much! Loving me has not always been easy, but with soul searching I finally have learned to do so, I just pray for the young men that did this to me, because there is obviously lots of pain that they are dealing with and it made them feel big to hit a grown man and run, I hope I helped a few of their chest hairs grow in. I do forgive them for hurting me, and I pray that before it is too late that they change their thinking on how they view punks, faggots, queers, freaks, homos, or whatever other name they can come up with. I love myself for who I am and I am not changing for anyone.

Thank you to everyone who sent an email, text, instant message or phone call and for all of you who are wondering did I do anything… I did file a report. I love you all and please don’t get mad and feed into this type of behavior, put on your best drag (whatever that may be) and walk with your head high, I will not let these homophobic idiots hold me back. We are GREATER than HATE! I AM LOVE!


algie said...

my heart goes out to dwight for being a strong black gay spiritual man in 2010.he is so right about giving those guys who attacked him to god because only he can get them the way that he is gonna no doubt get him.this reminds me how important it is to teach your kids from birth how to treat others and that when you do wrong to good people who did nothing to you that IT WILL ALWAYS COME BACK TO YOU!!!!....to this generation coming up 2day spread love not hate

KingNmiami said...

I am so sorry this happen to you. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings on this terrible experience.